friday was a terrible day for dying. i mean….johnny cash, john ritter, ….and most of all…my fish lazarus. i know what you’re thinkin. ‘it’s just a fish bonnie!’….this wasnt just any fish….this was a special fish. i got him from a coworker at good ole winn-dixie over a year ago. he had won it at the carnival. i took it home and it was huge. i woke up the next morning to find an empty little aquarium. i searched the floor to find him barely alive on the carpet. i couldn’t flush him so i thought i would put him back in the water until he died. i found out later that my mom had found him on the carpet around 8am and i woke up and put him in the tank around 11am…so for at least 3 hours he was on the carpet. my mom thought he was dead and was late for work so she left him there for me to find later. a few hours later i went down to get the fish to flush him and he was swimming around perfectly fine. i will never have an explanation for that fish hehe. then on friday while on lunch break i heard rocks stirring and looked to see lazzi floating from the top to the bottom of the tank upside down. i guess i couldn’t expect another miracle…a few hours later he was still dead. RIP little guy!
Saturday
this weekend was once again crazy but very exciting. i found out on friday that i had the opportunity to have my whole family in one spot (which doesn’t happen often), here! the only catch was….no one could know about it but me and my oldest sister erin. well….we tried it that way at least. finally i had to call kelly’s cell and get her to convince my parents to come here. i tried telling them justin had to work, jennifer was out, AND it was family weekend. None of which were all that successful but with kelly’s help and a little guilt trip they got in the car and came here. gosh it was like pulling teeth or something. do i smell that bad? 😉 (dont answer that!) erin had an extra hour or so of a ride from the opposite direction and she told me to keep my family at the apartment. it just couldn’t be that easy hehe so after many hours of trying to leave notice of where we were going, we were reunited back at my apartment. the funniest part was when my parents parked right next to erin’s car in the driveway and didn’t even put two and two together. it was hilarious! but i’m glad things finally worked out. i made pasta salad and we sat around and talked and laughed. justin’s family even made a cameo appearance. all in all it was a good day!
weekend
wow this weekend flew….and apparently it did for most everyone i’ve spoken to. friday was so much fun going to the crest/shelby game. of course my team didn’t win but it was fun anyway and a change of scenery. saturday was supposed to be the day to finally finish the hope chest but some silly girl left the poly’ at her parents house 😉 so that was a lost cause. then justin and i went shopping and the greatest thing happened. i went down a whole size or two!!!…depending on how you look at it. i haven’t worn this size since maybe middle school 🙂 then it was off to olive garden with brandon and meagan. i must say i’ve never met another couple that i just clicked with right away. it was so much fun! they are awesome people! and now it’s monday…bleh! but the bright side….only 4 more days til the next weekend hehe
strange happenings
ok….so this has definitely been a strange couple of days. It seems that a lot of my guy friends have been resurfacing. Yesterday my friend Greg from charlotte that i haven’t seen in over a year, was on his way to nashville and stopped in the bookstore to see me. his company rented him a mustang convertable. of course it was BRIGHT yellow! but hey non the less it was cool! then last night while i was checking my usual sites….wantmoore.com, getoffthecomputer.com, etc…my ex jason popped up on aol instant messenger. he ended up calling me and talking to me for over an hour….gosh its been like 2 years since i have heard from him. Then this afternoon while at work my friend matt called my cell phone…it was quite a surprise! it’s just so weird how things tend to happen all at once.
3 more weeks til i get my kitty!!!! i can’t wait! i just hope that “kitty” and apache get along hehe or justin could be in for a few sleepless nights 😉
hopefully tomorrow (friday) justin and i will be going to the crest/shelby high school football game after work. it seems to be “the” thing to do around here. i’m thinking i’m more of a crest girl. not sure what justin has decided on. hopefully crest so i wont be sitting alone 😉
I really really ‘hope’ it doesn’t rain on saturday so justin and i can finally! finish the hope chest. then it looks like we might be traveling to charlotte to olive garden MMMM 🙂 with brandon and meagan. is it saturday yet? hehe it’s gonna be a lot of fun. i’m looking forward to meeting meagan. i’ve heard good things about her.
this weekend
going home always brings mixed feelings. it’s the world i used to be in, the world i can no longer return to and the world i long to be in sometimes. i guess there is no turning back. i love going home to see my parents and sisters, but when it’s time to leave i always have to push back tears when i pull away. things will never be the same. tonight while in church…i know i should have been listening to pastor stan but i couldn’t help letting my thoughts take over. i really miss my gma! it gets so hard not to cry each time i think of her. and tonight in church the thought hit me that by not visiting her or communicating with her it was like she was dead already. i know i will never get my gma back the way she used to be. its just so hard to watch her deteriorate more with time. i can’t help but worry that if i go see her she might not remember me. they tell us to stay away so she can adjust but then i think…..there has to be moments that she is herself….even if it’s just for a minute. but she must feel so abandoned….so alone. although we all love her so much…..it must be hard to see from her side. i just cant stand that i dont see her while she is still ‘here’. i just dont know what to do….my heart pounds even before i enter the building about what she’ll say, how she will react….how i will leave. i guess i just wish she was the way she used to be. i love her no matter what though and i hope she knows that. its just something i’ve been thinking about a lot lately and whether i cry or not….it doesn’t go away and the hurt is still there. the bookstore’s got me pretty busy but sometimes at night when things slow down….that’s when it hits me most. i pray everynight that she knows how much she is loved. i’m struggling whether to post this or not. i guess it couldn’t hurt to post it. not like there are a million people reading it.
idea
just an idea….but maybe i should pick a weird topic and write what i think about it…..when there really isn’t anything else to write about. ok here’s one that matt thomas brought up the other day at work….he says that the only reason most guys will befriend a girl is if he has some kind of hidden intentions toward her….some attraction of some sort. is this true? i dont know. i know that in the past i could relate to that. but i must say not with all of my guy friends. i think there are some that you befriend that you develop a true relationship with as a brother figure of some sort and the others are just for fun/attraction. i think there is something inside almost everyone that another person could find “attractive” if you want to use that word….whether it be a feature or an attitude. all i can say is i’m glad i dont have to worry about all that mess anymore. ok….goodnight to all!
just thinking
i guess i’m in a weird pondering mood tonight. today at church the flowers were given by an older couple (JC and Moana Sanders) there were 45 roses to represent 45 years of marriage. 45 years!!! i cant ‘even fathom being a part of anything for that long. they make a good team though. at the end of the service tonight they gave roses out to everyone. They were so beautiful! yellow, red, orange, and pink roses.
i think my goal for the next few months is to learn something new….something i’ve always wanted to do and just didn’t know how. not having homework will give me some time if i could just leave work at a decent hour.
i know this is gonna sound mushy and make som of you (not that there are any of you hehe) gag but today justin and i were taking a nap like we usually do on Sunday afternoons…. this time we stayed at my apartment. we fell asleep and somewhere inbetween dreams i woke up and justin’s arms were around me and my head was on his chest and it just felt so good…..so warm …..so right. and i couldnt help but watch him sleep for a little while…our breathing patterns the same…just jumping for joy inside thinking that someday we might have a chance to do that everynight. i never feel more safe than when i’m in his arms. even after all this time he still gives me butterflies. Pastor Stan said the sweetest thing the other day to us after church….he said that he looks at us and he sees how we feel about each other and he sees us at church and it just makes him so happy (well something like that hehe) I think it’s so cool that people can see how much we mean to each other. The other night everything that had been on my mind and worrying me finally got the best of me and despite my best efforts to conceal my pain justin saw right through it. he just let me cry and cry and cry and i cant even begin to tell you how much that meant to me.
ok…..time to do the dishes!
woo hoo!!!! today came with some good news. they finally decided to hire maxine back in the bookstore. we will have some help!!!things are once again…or should i say still stressful in the bookstore and i cannot wait until rush is over. pretty soon we are going to have to start 12 hour shifts (even though i do 10 or 11 hours each day anyway) but still 8-8 can make for long days and weeks. oh well at least maxine is back!
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